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The Invisible Power Of Embracing

Do you often have these thoughts running through your mind?

“Oh, he/she looks better than me.”

“He/she has a better life than me.”

“He/she gets more likes than me.”

“He/she gets there faster than me.”

Do you often compare yourself to others?
Do you want results fast and often impatience with the process?

Most of us want to be better than others or at least the same as others, so we do not feel “fault” or “odd”. Often we’re afraid of showing our uniqueness and embracing what we have. We fear being vulnerable, revealing our true selves, and letting the world know who we really are. And we’re afraid of losing credibility because we aren’t perfect.

So, we try to hide the things that make us stand out from the crowd to be seen as “just like everyone else”. Or we try to fit ourselves into what we call the “majority” box.

The trouble is that hiding your true self, dimming your voice, and shadowing your lights trying to fit in is what keeps you away from reaching your true potential.

Overthinking, perfectionism, competitive thinking, fear and anxiety are the noises in your head that hinder you from expressing, making the true connection, and impacting you meant to make. It also impedes the growth you’ve meant to gain in your life, holding you off from the life full of happiness, freedom, and possibilities you’ve meant to live.

Embrace your pace, strength, and uniqueness is the first step to healing and growth. Stop comparing with others with your pace, strength and have. You are right where you are meant to be.

“A flower does not think of competing with the other flower next to it, and it just blooms.” Zhen Shin

“Be Simply Yourself. Don’t compare and compete.” Lao Tzu

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished” Lao Tzu.

Life isn’t a race. So, stop dimming your authentic voice and light. Let it shine to its full potential. You are and always will be the most important asset you have.

I hope this helps you today.

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Five Ways You Can Do To Get Out Of The Depression & Anxiety

Today, more and more people are beginning to enter a state of decadence and despair.

We live in a highly stimulating world; it is easy to feel that the body is hollowed out. The sense of achievement and harvest is less and less and often caught in the rush to do something for no reason, slowly becoming miserable and meaningless, and entering a kind of depression.

Depressed people like to procrastinate, like self-doubt, self-criticism, low sense of self-worth, fall into the trough of emotions, and feel self-pity, so they are not interested in doing anything. It is more challenging to be motivated; I am too lazy to argue about everything, too lazy to work hard, and gradually enter a state of “it is what it is”. Day after day, the daily unwillingness accumulates more and more depression and frustration.

With the rapid advancement of technology, it seems that we have more and more control over the world. We have automobiles, which greatly expand human freedom and can go anywhere we want, but when you look at the traffic jams in big cities, you will find that our time is taken up by anxious waiting.

We have more material supplies and more choices, and educational resources. However, today’s children are not happier than us in the past. In the past, as long as you went to work on time and saved money regularly, you could buy a house within a few years, but now, if you still work step by step and work hard, you often still cannot afford a house.

When we feel more and more uncertainty and a stronger sense of losing control, we are prone to anxiety and restlessness, which breeds a decadent and depressing emotional state and wants to escape the burdens and responsibilities of life.

When you are trapped in a decadent and depressed emotional state, here’s are five ways you can do to get out of the negative form of decadence and depression.

1. Be mindful

Many times, our depression is dragging us step by step into the abyss of anxiety. One of the most effective ways to get yourself out of depression is to keep yourself mindful of expelling those depressing thoughts that pop up from time to time.

Our mind tends to drift to past experiences and patterns or future outcomes that are not happening yet. Either way, we let the present moment slip through our hands. Ended up, we cannot construct an inner order for ourselves that faces the past and is not afraid of the future. Instead, we are lost in the cognitive dilemma of passive burnout and self-imposed limitations.

Mindful of our emotion, our state of mind can help us make conscious choices, the meaning we associate ourselves to the event and decide how we react to it. The person who can help us out of the state of depression, there is no one else but ourselves, because in this world, everyone else is just a projection of your inner self.

2. Anything that happens, aware that it is not about you

How we experience reality is a product of the meaning we give to an event.

“Hey, I’m almost a waste…”

“I’m so useless, and I can’t learn at all…”

“I shouldn’t have tried….”

“I don’t deserve it….”

These are the common negative thoughts that show up in people based upon the outcome they received from their actions. I believe that most people are full of hope in life initially. Still, sometimes life will be played as a bad card in our hands, and if we associate the event negatively and “it’s about us”, it easy to go downwards to biting yourself up and hard to get back up. End up feeling powerless and ended up in a state of decadence and despair.

So to change the state of depression, the first step is to aware that it is not about you; see in bigger picture greater than you. In another words, don’t take it personally. Knowing that you have tried your best and if the result did not happen as you desired doesn’t mean anything negatively. Accept the status quo, face it and take it as a lesson learned instead of resisting it. Because resistance means that we are held hostage by our immediate depression, which is like action and reaction in physics, the more you resist it, the more pressure it puts on you.

3. Accept emotions are just temporary; it comes and go.

When we accept the current decadent emotions, we realize that the current decadence and frustration are only temporary. As long as we re-understand ourselves, we can reshape a new value that can make us make better choices, and then we will get a different result. You can truly accept yourself, adjust yourself, and have the opportunity to change your current state.

To accept the state of depression is to stop self-criticism, self-doubt, and self-criticism, give yourself a relaxed state of mind, and admit your shortcomings and problems.

4. Let go of a competitive mindset and build a sense of meaning.

The higher expectations you give to yourself result from comparing yourself with others; for example, comparing how much salary, how big a house, how much power and social status, and how good a car you possess will drift your way from having a real sense of meaning in life and makes you choked with enormous pressure and anxiety. Anxiety and stress can build up by lingering fears of missing out, losing what you have, fear of being judged, and failure.

At this time, we need to let go of demanding ourselves by secular standards and give up following the crowd. Let go of expectations from a competitive mindset and stress on the outcome, take baby steps and focus on the process, adopt a step-by-step continuous behaviour model, progress is all matters and build the meaning of personal persistence.

“Don’t compare yourself with other people, compare yourself with who you were yesterday”, Jordan Peterson

5. Take power back and own your life

Feeling powerless due to decadence and depression is very common, especially when we think more and more about uncertainty and a stronger sense of loss of control. Most people subconsciously choose to escape the burdens and responsibilities of life, and saying “I have no choice” has become a common excuse.

Acknowledge you have a choice. Even in this dark moment when you feel choice is so limited, you still have a choice to choose what to do. Ability to choose between different possible courses of action unimpeded. Sometimes things happen that are out of what we can control, and we can choose how we perceive the situation, people and ourselves, and how we will react to it. Ignorant and clinging to comfort can cause people not to realize their power of free will.

Own your life and utilize the superpower of free will to craft your way to success. For example, you can choose to do 20 sit-ups every day, starting from the small things within your ability. When you establish your sense of ritual and meaning in your daily life, then you can allow yourself to feel in control of your life. And this inner sense of control and fulfilment of life will gradually dissolve the state of depression and affect other aspects of life. Your body will get better and better. And you will become more and more confident in yourself and the sustainable process to your end goal.

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4 Tips On Handling Anxiety During A Pandemic

Anxiety comes in many shapes and sizes. In our regular day-to-day living, we already experience feeling anxious sometimes. It is not the same for everyone, but one thing’s for sure: the coronavirus pandemic is a top-up on our already-existing issues.

It’s not easy having to remind ourselves to wash our hands frequently and stay away from people. Not to mention having to get used to that uncomfortable feeling of wearing face masks in public. There are a lot of new things that we should start considering our normal, and this shift may heighten our anxiety. Here are a few tips that can help in dealing with them:

1.  Recognize that what you’re feeling is anxiety.

Contrary to some beliefs, ignoring the problem won’t make the problem go away. Addressing the situation allows you to have control over it. You can start by writing down all your worries and concerns for you to have a clearer picture. Once you finally understand where your anxiety is stemming from, you can identify how you can solve your problems and handle things that you can’t change.

2.  Relief only comes when you know how to handle the threat.

The threat may still be there—but knowing when or how the threat attacks help us handle the attacks better. Being productive and maintaining friendships may seem like a taxing job at first, but it may give you a sense of control. It may make you realize that you only need a distraction from your pool of emotions. However, be cautious enough to recognize if something is really harming your mental health. Distractions are good, but they are not always the solution.  

3.  It will not always be okay.

Recognize that all people have tough days and experience bad events. Even the successful people experience unfortunate events.

4.  Be present.

Anxiety will not exist if you shift your awareness to present, the moment of NOW. Many of us either live in the future, always anticipate what to be or will happen next or living in the past repeating the story may no longer serve us well towards what you want to achieve in life. We tend to think what we desire is in the future tense and comes with conditions e.g. until you achieve something, then you will be happy. Or in times when there’s uncertainty or out of normality, you may associate the unknown about the future with fear or worry. Bring your awareness to NOW, you will find anxiety disappear almost instantly.

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4 Simple Ways to Unleash Your Maximum Potential

Have you ever wondered what it feels like to embrace who you are? Wouldn’t your life be great if you have discovered your full potential and you can achieve whatever goals you set your mind for? 

We all want to be the best. No one likes being mediocre. We desire to have an extraordinary standard of living. However, despite our goal of living a successful life, we are often hindered by our fears and our insecurities. Starting today, you will not be living a life of regret, but of success and motivation.

Here are some simple ways to help you unleash your greatest potential:

1. Have a vision and achieve it.

Remember: there is a purpose and goal in everything you should be doing. Start with that. Assess your intentions and figure out what you want to be and achieve in your life. Without a clear vision, you will just be like a headless chicken who has no idea of where you are going. Knowing what you want to accomplish in life and who you want to be will help you discover your full potential.

2. Dream bigger.

To unleash your potential, you need to dream bigger because when you dream big, your problem becomes small. When you let go of any second guessing and what others tell you can or cannot; should or should not, you step into the power of possibilities. Avoid comparing yourself to other people because your only competitor in this life is yourself. Be curious and question how you can be a better version of yourself than yesterday. Have fun in the journey and believe on the person you’ve meant to be. Hunger for growth, not the outcome. You will then realised you can achieve your dream at ease.

3. Be confident.

When you are not confident, there is no way that you can discover your true potential. Having more confidence allows you to perform better in anything you do. When you operate from being the greater version of you, you get to focus on discovering who you get to become in the process. The rest is just a fun and exhilarating adventure of discovering yourself. If you do things in this manner, people’s judgement, rejection, criticism will not be able to shake you.

4. Pursue personal growth.

Learning and growth never stops. Even as you age, it is always good to invest in yourself. To unleash your potential, you have to continuously develop your skills, learn new things, and prioritize your personal growth.

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It Is Okay To Not Be Okay

Life is not perfect. Each one of us goes through times in our lives when we feel we are at our lowest, darkest moments. And that’s okay. It is perfectly okay to not be okay. You know why? Because you do not have to get stuck in that dump that you’re in, because we all are imperfect human beings here to learn what life truly means. No matter how much life sucks and how bad things are for you at the moment, the beauty of it is – the gain is exponential if you choose to learn from it and bounce back. Every low end is a perfect opportunity to reach the next height, the next level of potential.

The truth remains – Life is beautiful, without darkness we will not learn to appreciate the light, without sorrow, we will not able to learn what joy truly means. Recognize that all people have tough days and experience bad events. Even the luckiest and successful people experience unfortunate events. This is the moment for you to choose to step into your will power to change and react or give in to darkness which means give your power away to circumstances and others. And there is always hope. If you choose to see it.If you give yourself a chance.

In times when you feel like drowning in an open sea, or locked up in a prison cell, what do you do? Even in this darkness moment like this when you feel choice is so limited, you still have choice to choose what experience you want to get out of it. Will you choose to just stay there and let yourself drown and sink down to the bottom of the sea or will you choose to experience calm and think for a way out? Will you scream your lungs out, cry for help to get out of the prison or choose to experience peace and think for a way out? The choice is yours.

The first step to solving a problem is acknowledging that you have a problem. You will not know where or how to start taking action when you do not even admit to yourself that you have a problem. Acknowledge that we all are imperfect human beings. It’s okay to be judged, to fail and learn and be better. Start by asking yourself. What is it that has been bugging you, making you restless and giving you sleepless nights? Recognize where the struggles come from. Why you are feeling what you are feeling. Why you are doing what you’ve been doing.

After recognizing and acknowledging the problem, you have to believe that you have a choice. You always have a choice. A choice to walk away from that misery. The choice to change and be better. The choice to move forward and slowly seek for  what it is that you want to achieve. Who you decide to be, where you decide to put your focus and attention on, what perspectives you choose to hold? You always have a choice. You can choose to stay miserable or you can choose to see the silver lining and see the learning of every possibility to growth.

Now, think about what it is exactly you want to achieve. If it is happiness, what exactly will make you happy? What are the options you have in order to be happy? What will bring you peace, happiness, freedom or all three? What will it take to get there? What do you need to let go to experience all that?

Now, take action. Get up. I understand it is painful to get up from the pain but the thing is, if you don’t get up you know for sure what you going to get – in the same pain. Nothing changes. Rise from the dump you are sitting on. Often times, taking action entails change. And the first step towards change is to access and examine within yourself. What are the stories and perspectives that no longer serve you and should be let go? What are the things that you should stop doing? If you continue to do what you’ve been doing, nothing will change.

You see, most people have the habit of just waiting for circumstances to change before taking any action. Without taking action to change the circumstances, nothing will happen. You will just be doomed to stay in those miserable circumstances. And they say misery loves company. If you spend time with people who are as miserable as you are, you will become even more miserable. Choose your circle. Spend time with people who are positive and passionate about life. In no time, you will begin to be like them.

Now, make that change. Step into your will power and own your life, be the person you always meant to be. I believe that every imperfect human being are born for a purpose to experience a meaning of life that means for them. Be curious, enjoy the process, in life there’s no failure but only learning. Start taking steps towards achieving that dream. That goal. And don’t settle for less than what you deserve. Dream big. Set high goals. When your dream is big, your problem becomes smaller. 

I invite you to think again, “You always have a choice”. Now make the choice that what’s best for you. Make that change. Help yourself. Life is short. Start now 🙂